Dad jokes, for anyone unaware, are essentially jokes that are extremely corny in nature. I believe the term ‘dad joke’ came to be as a result of so many dads and dad figures making use of these sorts of jokes on a rather frequent basis, although I’m not entirely certain.
I don’t exactly know why, but I’ve always found dad jokes to be pretty entertaining. So, I wanted to see if I could find some of the best ones out there to share with all of you. These jokes come from countryliving.com.
- “I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.
- “My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
- “Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one!
- “Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.
- “What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common? They’re both Paris sites.
- “What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.
- “How do you follow Will Smith in the snow? You follow the fresh prints.
- “If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims.
- “I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along.
- “What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.
- “Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
- “What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
- “Have you heard about the chocolate record player? It sounds pretty sweet.
- “What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
- “Why do seagulls fly over the ocean? Because if they flew over the bay, we’d call them bagels.
- “I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.
- “How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
- “What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.
- “What did the zero say to the eight? That belt looks good on you.
- “A skeleton walks into a bar and says, ‘Hey, bartender. I’ll have one beer and a mop.’
- “Where do fruits go on vacation? Pear-is!
- “I asked my dog what’s two minus two. He said nothing.
- “What did Baby Corn say to Mama Corn? Where’s Pop Corn?
- “What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
- “What does a sprinter eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
- “Where do you learn to make a banana split? Sundae school.
- “What has more letters than the alphabet? The post office!
- “Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!
- “What do you call a poor Santa Claus? St. Nickel-less.
- “I got carded at a liquor store, and my Blockbuster card accidentally fell out. The cashier said never mind.
- “Where do boats go when they’re sick? To the boat doc.
- “I don’t trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.
- “My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right!
- “How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut.
- “Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
- “I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.
- “What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody knows.
- “Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it!
- “Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
- “What did one hat say to the other? Stay here! I’m going on ahead.
- “Why did Billy get fired from the banana factory? He kept throwing away the bent ones.
- “Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don’t think they’ll fit me.
- “Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
- “What does a lemon say when it answers the phone? Yellow!
- “This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.
- “What kind of car does an egg drive? A yolkswagen.
- “Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn’t know it was on fire.
- “How do you make 7 even? Take away the s.
- “How does a taco say grace? Lettuce pray.
- “What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
- “Why didn’t the skeleton climb the mountain? It didn’t have the guts.
- “What do you call it when a snowman throws a tantrum? A meltdown.
- “How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.
- “I have a joke about chemistry, but I don’t think it will get a reaction.
- “What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
- “What does a bee use to brush its hair? A honeycomb!
- “How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.
- “Why did the math book look so sad? Because of all of its problems!
- “What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
- “My dad told me a joke about boxing. I guess I missed the punch line.
- “What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers!
- “How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
- “How did Harry Potter get down the hill? Walking. JK! Rowling,” the web page says.
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