Most of us are acquainted with the phrase if you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything at all. Yet, despite our familiarity with this common expression, I think quite a few of us could use some much-needed reminding of what exactly it stands for, and furthermore, its significance.
I recently had an interaction with someone who wasn’t terribly pleasant. I wouldn’t say this person and I are friends, but I would consider us acquaintances, and I speak with them whenever I run into them. I was sick with a sinus infection and had a bit of fever, and without any prior context, this individual approached me and asked me if something was wrong. When I responded no, they were gesturing toward their face in a weird manner; I couldn’t figure out what it was that they were trying to express, up until this person told me my face was rather red.
Unsure of how to respond to this observation, I said okay, and tried to change the subject, only for them to next tell me, not ask me, that I was sweating. I said I wasn’t, but they insisted, so I informed them that I had oily skin and what they were perceiving as sweat simply was not. I told them my skin always looks like that.
This person’s final contribution to our conversation? “Oh, well you’re not wearing makeup from what I can tell, and you usually do.”
At this point, I had become rather impatient with this person and their shit conversation, so I changed my tone and I think they finally tuned in and realized that their conversational approach tactic was not the greatest, and a bit rude. I’m not sure how else I was supposed to respond to a borderline insult, but this incident absolutely brought to mind the expression I mentioned earlier and its importance.
I’ve gotten to a point in my life in which I’ve accepted the fact that my acne-riddled skin will never be perfect, and I am now confident enough to go without an entire face of makeup. I’m not going to let what this person remarked diminish my confidence, but it doesn’t really help to improve the situation.
Sometimes it’s best just to bite your damn tongue.
Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash
ontheedgeofeverything 