My mom and I were discussing the concept of traditionalism recently. The topic came up because we received an invitation to an event, and while the invite was addressed to me, my sister and my parents, the wording pertaining to my parents was ‘Mr. and Mrs. Paul Arva.’ I mentioned to my mom how I have never understood the concept of a woman essentially losing her entire identity when she marries a man, and, quite frankly, I think it is absolute horseshit.
I explained to my mom that I had to fill out a form for the DJ providing the music for my and my fiancé’s upcoming wedding. I was asked to write out how I would like Blaine and me to be introduced as a married couple at our reception, and I wrote ‘Mr. Blaine Box and Mrs. Arva-Box.’ Like fuck I’m going to be introduced in a manner that suggests I am no longer me, Lauren, and am now referred to as my husbands’ identity. My name is Lauren. It ain’t Blaine.
I have never understood why so many of us are fearful of breaking tradition. What is the reasoning we are hesitant to do so? What do we think will happen? Will the planet implode if we actively choose to go against the grain and other ridiculous societal norms? Highly doubtful.
There is a notable reluctance amongst us human beings to challenge traditional constructs. I get it, to a certain extent; we are sometimes timid in the context of disrupting normalcy, but, to be completely candid, sometimes we need to rock the boat and get shit going. Life would be exceptionally boring if no one had the balls to break the mould of what is considered to me normal, or traditional, if you ask me, and I’m happy to get the whole damn yacht rocking.
Image from https://media.gettyimages.com/photos/bride-and-groom-on-bench-picture-id113231317?s=2048×2048
Hmm…I surmise it stems from a fear of the unknown. Tradition is often formed from things that are known and have been followed for centuries. Sticking to it guarantees a known and understandable result.
However, breaking tradition exposes one to uncertainty and what-ifs — alongside the fear of screwing up. “We fear what we do not know,” says one adage I read years ago.
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You are absolutely right. I couldn’t agree with you more. Thank you for reading!
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