Earlier this week, I had a colonoscopy and a gastroscopy done.
And, to answer your likely immediate question, no, it wasn’t the most pleasant experience.
These procedures were performed because of my stomach/digestive issues, and considering I’ve never had any sort of gastric procedure performed before, I was a little unsure of what to expect.
I was told to head to my pharmacy to pick up two separate types of laxatives; oral pills, and a powder. I took the pills two evenings before the procedure as instructed, and the powder the day before.
As painless as this may seem, it really wasn’t.
The oral laxatives were a breeze and didn’t seem to cause any significant effects after I consumed them. The powder, on the other hand, is a different story.
The laxative powder comes in a massive jug that resembles a jug of roundup, and I had to drink four litres of water to get it all down, plus an extra three litres of water on top. I wasn’t sure how quickly this stuff would kick in, but holy crap, it worked almost instantaneously.
A word of advice: if you have to get a colonoscopy done, and you have to drink this horrific-tasting shit, I suggest bringing the entire jug into the bathroom with you, along with some books and perhaps even a laptop to watch Netflix. You’ll be in there for a while, and it takes hours for the stuff to dissipate.
I wasn’t able to eat any food for almost a day-and-a-half prior to the procedure, and it was as unpleasant as you can imagine. The morning of the procedure, I wasn’t allowed to consume any fluids, either. Once I got to the hospital, things went quite smoothly, and I was awake and finished before I even knew it (I was sedated with anesthesia).
If you have to get a colonoscopy or a gastroscopy done, the worst part is without a doubt the prep. You will be oh so hangry, tired, miserable and irritable, but once you are wheeled out of those hospital doors, prepare to indulge and eat everything in sight and bask in the glory of how good it tastes.
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