Figuring out failed friendships

Friendship is a concept I sincerely hope all of us have been privy enough to experience at some point in our lives. It is a wonderful thing to be great friends with people who are important to us, and even more gratifying is having friendships that have been in existence for an extended period of time as the friendship itself has had ample opportunity to strengthen and flourish.

Despite how tremendous friendships are, I would argue that a lot of us have unfortunately experienced the downfall or slow diminishment of one, and trying to grapple and come to terms with this sort of loss can be challenging. It hurts, it’s difficult, and a lot of the time, a failed friendship leaves us asking ourselves a lot of questions and experiencing blame, too.

Friendships can deteriorate for a variety of reason, some of which are in our control and others that aren’t. Maybe you’ve been divided by a significant disagreement; perhaps your communication has failed; it’s possible you’re tired of putting in effort without any reciprocation. Regardless of the reasoning behind a failed friendship, coming to terms with the conclusion of something that was once great can be saddening.

Something worth keeping in mind in the context of unsuccessful friendships is the reason why it failed. If the reason could have been swayed by effort on your behalf, it’s possible it didn’t need to fail. If the reason is out of your hands, though, there isn’t much sense dwelling on it.

Failed friendships suck, but I believe they’re more common than we may realize. Granted, this is a harsh realization, but based on my observations and conversations with people, it is not uncommon whatsoever.

If you’re having trouble with a friend, consider why you’re feeling the way that you are. If it’s salvageable and will be beneficial to yourself by figuring out a way to make it work, I recommend doing just that.


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