Are you too hard on yourself?

I am someone who arguably dabbles in self-criticism more often than I should. I’m not entirely sure why it is I’m so hard on myself, but I have been my entire life. I think it stems from my perfectionist tendencies, if I had to take a guess, but I’m sure there are other contributing factors, too. I’d just rather not delve too deeply into the matter because we don’t really need a full-on therapeutic catharsis happening here on the internet.

I’m willing to bet that the majority of us are too hard on ourselves, and self-criticism can happen in just about any facet of life. Whether it’s in regards to work, family, friends, intimacy or social life, most of us have a tendency to place more emphasis and attention on everything we are doing wrong, or poorly, as opposed to what we are excelling at.

Without trying to get too analytical, I do believe social media has played a tremendous role in our lives in the context of promoting self-hatred and criticism. The older I get, the more I realize how draining and toxic social media platforms can be; they promote feelings of inadequacy, isolation, comparison and longing, and because younger generations are growing up with them and spending far too much time using them, it makes sense we, collectively as a society, have a solid amount of inferiority and self-acceptance/happiness issues.

I tend to be hardest on myself when I fail at something, or when I feel as though I’m not being productive enough. This often occurs when I’m having a Lyme flare-up – my body is struggling to keep up with daily tasks and activities, and because of this, my mind begins to work against my body because I begin feeling guilty for not getting as much done as I normally do.

Lyme flare-up or not, this happens to the best of us when we’re having a shitty day.

If we are feeling rough, there is a strong chance there is a reason for it. Rather than getting angry and establishing unrealistic standards for ourselves, maybe we should consider taking a moment to comprehend why it is we are feeling crappy and figure out how to feel better as opposed to beating ourselves up about it.


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